My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
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