Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize