you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize
