Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
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