The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
