sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
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