wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
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