Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
Randomize
