11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
Randomize
