can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
Its 6am. Um if my mom for some reasons asks, you stopped by my house around ten and had some wine with me. She is concerned I drank a whole bottle by myself. Woke me at 6am to interrogate..Thank god my pounding head thinks fast.
PS We had chips too. She is less concerned about the whereabouts of the chips but still a good lie always needs detail.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
I DEMAND FORESKIN
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