Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
I spent most of the stoned conversation with my dad proving to him that the Newfoundland is an actual dog and NOT a Snuffaluffagus-esque figment of my stoned imagination, while laughing over the fact there is actually a place caller Dildo, Canada. Have YOU taken time to be a good dad today?
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
Randomize
