Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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