Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize