I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
