Just cropdusted the office
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
Randomize
