She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
