He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
Randomize
