So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
Randomize