You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
This dudes playing guitar and singing outside our window and he's like "ravioli is beterrrrrrr than tortelliniIii cause tortelliniiii is shaped like fucking ears"
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
Randomize
