Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
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