Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
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