He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
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