I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
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