come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
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