i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
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