Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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