I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
True college students do jello shots in the library
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