it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Randomize
