I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
is wine microwaveable?
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
Randomize
