i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
Jelly. This is your "are you still alive" text. Any response will do.
Hey I found a cat!
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
Randomize
