we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
You were so drunk that some guy dressed as Harry Potter pointed his wand at you and screamed "Accio SHITSHOW"
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
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