Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
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