I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
Randomize
