your thong is hanging out like whoa
I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
Randomize
