Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
Randomize
