Do you still have your period?
North Korea, Best Korea!
it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
Randomize