these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
I would like to be the first to explain to you that if you've woken up with bruised knuckles this morning, it's because last night you tried climbing out of our car window and into the drive through window at maccas. The cashier chick freaked out and slammed the window on you and beat you around the head with her headset thingy.
Shittttttt.
Be not ashamed. It was youtube-worthy.
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
Randomize
