Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
Wow.. I was doing a mental check of my bank balance & I literally just said to myself: 'I have 27 dollars and a bottle of tequila til tuesday-ill be fine'
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
Randomize
