he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
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