If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
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