Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
Randomize
