just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
Randomize
