Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
Randomize
