I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
Randomize
