wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
Over Bumbled last night. I think I set my dog up on a date Sunday afternoon. I have to drive him, meet the other dog’s dad and secretly drink a bottle of champagne from a “water bottle”. This is not what I expected 30 to be like.
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