I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
Just cropdusted the office
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
Randomize