it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Randomize
