i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
Randomize