Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
Panties = found
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
Randomize
