in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
Randomize