I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
Randomize
