you only like me because i go down faster than a bridge in minnesota
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
