Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
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