and you said cock pushups were impossible
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
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