YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
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